chrssy: riding your man like
thararescizor: blackandmilds: I’ll suck a boy soul right out his dickhead dude I don’t give a shit u need 2 suck the gotdam verses out the dam bible
multipack: pu$$y so cheap its pu¢¢y
do you ever put on music in your room or whatever and sing along then you walk out, still singing and come back in and it lines up with the song and you feel like a god
vaspim: Maybe I’ll be a teacher. Y’all wanna learn something today? *jumps up on desk and spreads my butt cheeks* gonna teach y’all how to eat ass. You Finna learn today
radstunts: scraggay: therealhamster: scraggay: handjobs are fuckin lame i can do that myself you can scratch your own damn back but that doesnt mean it feels the same yo i honestly tried to think of a witty response but i cannot damn that is a very valid point this is the most civil ending to an argument i have ever witnessed on the internet
rnilkbreath: rnilkbreath: rnilkbreath: i was supposed to go to bed an hour ago dont tell my mom my mom says i have to go to bed now which one of u meaners told who the fuck changed ‘fuckers’ to ‘meaners’
THE WEATHER TODAY
dinosaurcowboy: Muggy and drizzling early in the morning Lightning and raining in the morning Sunny, clear and hot as fuck at noon Cloudy in the afternoon and now it’s hailing SPRING IN TEXAS EVERYBODY
kingjaffejoffer: I don’t smoke but one of my life goals is to perfect holding a conversation with a cigarette flapping out of the corner of my lips but somehow never falling. I’ve always admired that skill from afar.
meladoodle: *prosecuting lawyer voice* i have only one question for the defendant… ‘guiltypersonsayswhat?’ “what?” haha owned you’re going to jail
kikiarty: What I mean when I call someone perfect is, “Wow look at how flawed you are, how broken. Look how much of a disaster you are and how you are constantly torn between right and wrong and you make so many mistakes along the way wow look how human you are.” So basically when I say they are perfect what I mean is thank god they aren’t.
applebright: seriously considering filling my pockets with glitter and whenever someone near me says something really stupid or rude i’ll just reach into my pocket with a dead expression and release the glitter into the sky above their head and watch it shower over them like a baptism of stupid
kanyes: wheredoievenbelong: kanyes: jillian123456789: kanyes: I’ve been laughing at this for 8465312 years She likes Coldplay. My life is complete! dude……she’s married to the lead singer WAIT I GET IT!!! that’s because I just explained it
cassiesandsnark: you know i make a lot of threats for someone who is short and cant even do a push up